We Are Prisoners of Our Childhoods

The messages we received as very young children are imprinted with indelible ink; they become like a freckle on our brain, they become the lenses through which we see and experience our adult lives. And, the connection from one repeated message when we were 4, for example, does not directly translate to one’s behavior when we are 44. It is in symbols, metaphors, and mis-assumptions.

And, they can appear in layers, which can further obstruct easy viewing.
A person can experience a duality..shame and sadness, guilt and anger, chaos and fear. But, this occurs because one’s sub-conscious is designed to protect us…so, only what one is ready to fully understand will be revealed. We have all the true answers inside of ourselves, but they are in code.

So, where is the codebook? Who can decipher the road ahead for us?

Children’s emotional compass is set by the time they are 5. Scary thought, actually. Children are like sponges...they absorb EVERYTHING…they do not know the difference between good and bad, healthy or un-healthy, right or wrong. They are totally innocent and for the most part just take it all in.

So, it is up to the parents to set the boundaries, the rules of ‘engagement’ as it were, so this new little entity gets a chance to be themselves, gets appreciated for being an individual, for being separate and not at the whim of the siblings and other caregivers who can be toxic.

But, for the most part, most of us did not grow up in that ideal environment, on the contrary. We spend so much of our adult life trying to un-do the damage we experienced as very young children.

The codebook is inside of you; you have all the answers. You just need permission to access them.

Next Blog we will talk about how to gain access.